11th over: England 62-3 (Banton 5, Billings 0) Banton has started watchfully, especially against the spin of McBrine. That’s fair enough as the run-rate isn’t an issue. McBrine has half an appeal for LBW when Banton drags a sweep onto his pad and away for a couple of runs.
10th over: England 59-3 (Banton 2, Billings 0) Sam Billings is the new batsman. Eoin Morgan, the selfless git, has demoted himself from No4 to give the fringe batsmen a chance to play a longer innings.
WICKET! England 59-3 (Vince c Tucker b Young 25)
Deja Vince. After playing some delightful strokes, James Vince falls in frustrating circumstances. He had a big drive at a tempting delivery from Young and edged it straight to the keeper. Vince goes for an ephemeral 25.
9th over: England 54-2 (Vince 21, Banton 1) Vince makes it four fours in five balls with a firm sweep off McBrine. He is such a beautiful batsman; he could make a flat-footed reverse hoick look elegant.
8th over: England 49-2 (Vince 17, Banton 0) High-class batting from James Vince, who hits Young for three boundaries in four balls: a drive through mid-off, a clip through midwicket an finally an effortless pull stroke.
7th over: England 37-2 (Vince 5, Banton 0) Banton gets two thirds of the way down the track before realising Vince has sent him back. He gets home comfortably but that’s another reflection of England’s scruffy start.
“We need more fracking information from John Starbuck,” says David Wall. “Does he use mango puree (like in the cans you can buy)? Cheesecake is the only cake worth spending time eating and my regular recipe is pretty good (as well as adaptable and forgiving). But my niece wants a mango cheesecake for her birthday so I’ve been thinking how best to do that. Personally I’m not so keen on fruit cheesecakes (too reminiscent of the Sara Lee freezer imposters) but even bad cheesecake is good.”
6th over: England 36-2 (Vince 4, Banton 0) The precocious Tom Banton is the new batsman.
WICKET! England 34-2 (Roy LBW b Young 24)
Jason Roy can fuggoff himself! He has been trapped LBW after hitting Young’s two previous balls for four. It was a fine delivery that nipped back to hit the flap of the back pad, with Roy surprisingly slow to get his bat down. He knew it was out and walked straight off without discussing a review.
at 1.14pm EDT
5th over: England 26-1 (Roy 16, Vince 3) After a slow start, Roy gets down on one knee to clout McBrine over midwicket for six. The last time I watched him bat, I hadn’t seen Succession. Now every time I think of his name I picture a man in a shawl cardigan telling me to fuggoff. On the plus side, at least there isn’t an England batsman named Walnuts.
“Mango and ginger biscuit cheesecake,” says Damian Clarke. “Could you let Mr Starbuck know that I just might be a little in love with him?”
4th over: England 14-1 (Roy 6, Vince 1) Vince scrambles to make his ground after being sent back by Roy. I think he would have been just home had Young’s throw hit the stumps, which it didn’t. It’s been a rusty start from the England batsmen, which I suppose is understandable in the circumstances.
3rd over: England 12-1 (Roy 5, Vince 0) “Hi Rob,” says Peter Rowntree. “Dave Willey showing he is still a force to be reckoned with in white ball cricket. Recalling his early career, he suffered horrendous injuries to his back and neck, making it almost inevitable that his body would never really stand up to the longer formats of the game. For all that, he is a very fine cricketer, and a very likeable young man.”
He sure is, and he accepted his omission from the World Cup squad with admirable dignity. He still played his part, I truly believe that, especially in the 2018 series against India. Had England lost that series, I don’t think they’d have won the World Cup.
WICKET! England 12-1 (Bairstow LBW b McBrine 2)
Bairstow has gone! It hit him in line and was going on to hit leg stump.
at 12.53pm EDT
2.5 overs: England 12-0 (Roy 5, Bairstow 2) The offspinner Andy McBrine comes on second change… in the third over. Bairstow survives a very good shout for LBW after pushing down the wrong line … but Ireland are going to review. He might be outside the line of off stump; if not, it’s plumb.
at 12.53pm EDT
2nd over: England 11-0 (Roy 4, Bairstow 2) The sight of Roy and Bairstow means another airing for the stat that keeps on giving: of the 125 openers to score 1000 runs or more in ODIs, Roy and Bairstow have the highest strike-rates. Bairstow’s record as an opener is astonishing: average 51, strike-rate 110.
Craig Young shares the new ball with McCarthy (and Stirling). A loose delivery deflects for four leg-byes, and an LBW shout against Bairstow is caught in the throat because of an inside edge.
1st over: England 4-0 (Roy 3, Bairstow 0) Roy bagged a first-baller for the Lions against Ireland the other day. He almost makes it back-to-back golden ducks when he misses a big drive at McCarthy’s first ball, and then gets off the mark with a sliced drive past backward point for two. It was a no-ball as well, called by the third umpire under the new system. It also means a free hit, but Roy can only mow it to midwicket.
No-balls are the least of Ireland’s worries. McCarthy has injured himself and is leaving the field after only five deliveries. Paul Stirling bowls the last ball of the over.
“Hi Rob,” says John Starbuck. “Tell us: do you like cheesecake? If so, I recommend a form developed by this household. Use mango as your fruit and ginger biscuits as your base. It takes a few practice runs to get it just right but is really toothsome.”
I don’t, I’m afraid: I have what might generously be described as a confused palate. But I’m sure plenty of our readers do, so thanks for the tip!
The players are back out on the field. Barry McCarthy will open the bowling to Jason Roy.
Thanks Simon, evening everyone. So far the match has been predictably one-sided, but there have been some nice individual stories: Gareth Delany’s eyecatching cameo, Curtis Campher’s unbeaten 59 on debut and David Willey’s maiden five-for in his first ODI since May 2019. It will take another – a Barry McCarthy five-for, perhaps – if Ireland are to turn this into a contest.
Innings break: England require 173 at a shade under 3.5 an over
Right then, I’m off. Rob Smyth will take you through England’s response. Please send your thoughts to him here. Bye!
WICKET! Young c Roy b Willey 11 (Ireland 172 all out)
44.4 overs: Ireland 172 all out (Campher 59*) Campher comes down the track and miscues his shot, which drops just beyond the reach of Morgan at cover! Then Young hoists one way into the late afternoon sky, but just beyond Roy as he runs back from mid-off! And then he miscues again, and this one forces Roy to dive forwards but he completes the catch and ends the innings! It’s also Willey’s first ODI five-fer!
at 12.20pm EDT
44th over: Ireland 168-9 (Campher 58, Young 9) Young gets a leading edge that goes just beyond the grasping left arm of the bowler and away for four. A little later Campher has a royal heave and the ball skims straight past him and just wide of off stump!
43rd over: Ireland 160-9 (Campher 57, Young 3) “Watching the MLB these last few days demonstrates how hard baseballers throw the ball deploying (it seems) two techniques – one for the infield and another for the outfield,” writes Gary Naylor. “All these coaches, but players still throw like they did in schoolboy cricket.” This is interesting, and would probably be even more interesting if I ever watched baseball. I remember reading about Fred Spofforth being able to throw a fresh egg 50 yards in such a fashion that it wouldn’t break upon landing, and thinking that some nuances of throwing have been lost somewhere, beyond mere pace and distance.
at 12.03pm EDT
42nd over: Ireland 157-9 (Campher 56, Young 1) A single off the last keeps Young on strike and denies Mahmood a wicket maiden.
WICKET! McCarthy c Vince b Mahmood 3 (Ireland 156-9)
Barry McCarthy sends the ball soaring in a delicious arc straight into the pouch of Vince at deep square leg!
at 12.06pm EDT
41st over: Ireland 155-8 (Campher 56, McCarthy 3) Willey, having laid waste to the top order, comes back to wrap things up. Nothing is wrapped, nor is any waste laid.
40th over: Ireland 152-8 (Campher 55, McCarthy 2) Into the final 10 overs we rip. For a long time it didn’t look like Ireland would make it this far, but Campher’s 111-ball (and counting) 55 has ensured they will have at least something to celebrate.
at 11.45am EDT
39th over: Ireland 145-8 (Campher 52, McCarthy 1) Moeen completes his allocation, for no wickets and 37 runs, mainly thanks to the 10 scored in over 35.
38th over: Ireland 145-8 (Campher 50, McCarthy 0) McBrine rips into Curran, hitting consecutive and extremely handsome fours before hoisting down the ground for what was clearly intended to be a six but never quite made it. He didn’t stop there, though, and the last ball of the over goes straight to the hands of Billings.
at 11.39am EDT
WICKET! McBrine c Billings b Curran 40 (Ireland 145-8)
McBrine shifts gear, starts really motoring, and then ruins it by picking out Billings at deep square leg!
at 11.43am EDT
37th over: Ireland 131-7 (Campher 50, McBrine 28) Moeen gets one to rip off the pitch, from wide of off stump to being on its way well wide of leg when it hit Campher. Bairstow has an optimistic appeal, but to no avail. Next ball he gets the single he needs to reach his half-century. It’s been an excellent debut for the 21-year-old, who has dug his team out of a large hole to reposition them in, well, a much smaller but still quite daunting hole.
at 11.39am EDT
36th over: Ireland 131-7 (Campher 48, McBrine 28) The players take drinks, after which Curran comes back. McBrine takes a bit of a wild swing at the last but top-edges over Bairstow for four.
at 11.30am EDT
35th over: Ireland 124-7 (Campher 46, McBrine 23) McBrine goes on one knee and swings his bat in a great arc. The camera pans upwards to follow the ball’s trajectory towards the boundary, then the cameraman realises it’s not there, pans downwards again and there it is, rolling harmlessly towards a fielder. Last ball of the over he goes again, and this one he catches cleanly and sends soaring into the stands for six!
34th over: Ireland 114-7 (Campher 45, McBrine 14) McBrine pulls Mahmood’s final delivery, a handsome shot. Straight to Rashid though, so just a single for it.
33rd over: Ireland 110-7 (Campher 42, McBrine 13) There were as many boundaries in the fourth over of this match as there have been in the last 23 overs. Three, since you ask.
32nd over: Ireland 106-7 (Campher 40, McBrine 11) Mahmood comes back, and Ireland score a few singles. It still looks a fine batting track I think, particularly in the blazing sun.
31st over: Ireland 103-7 (Campher 39, McBrine 9) “Richard Noble got me thinking about ‘that region’,” muses Dave Brown. “I remember opening the batting for my school when I stopped the bowler in his run up, realising I forgot to don my box. I trudged off to the changing rooms to rectify this. Came back to face the first ball of the game … skittled. It felt a long walk back.”
30th over: Ireland 99-7 (Campher 37, McBrine 7) Rashid is all bowled out, his 10 overs costing 26 and bringing one wicket (and a run out).
29th over: Ireland 98-7 (Campher 36, McBrine 7) Moeen’s fifth over goes for a couple.
The ball would have cleared the stumps, concludes ball tracking, and anyway hit the batsman so far from the stumps that the technology can’t be relied upon, leading to a rarely-witnessed umpire’s call for excess distance.
REVIEW! Is McBrine out here?
He came way down the track to Moeen, making the on-field umpire’s job difficult, but though he’s unmoved England think they might have him.
28th over: Ireland 96-7 (Campher 35, McBrine 6) Runs! Rashid leaks seven, including a thumping crack over cow corner from Campher the brings the first boundary for 12 overs.
27th over: Ireland 89-7 (Campher 30, McBrine 4) Campher’s is – wait for it – the sixth slowest score of 30 or more against England since 1990. It’s the fourth slowest since the turn of the century, if that helps.
at 10.58am EDT
26th over: Ireland 87-7 (Campher 29, McBrine 3) Rashid’s eighth over yields but a single single.
25th over: Ireland 86-7 (Campher 28, McBrine 3) “So this isn’t a series, but three matches in the World Cup Super League,” notes Gary Naylor. “If England win the first two (some way to go I know), there’s no incentive for Morgan to sit one out and let Moeen lead or Rashid to step down and let Liam Livingstone bowl. Disappointing.” This is true. As with all leagues, it’s not just about having to play the good teams, but when you have to play them. For now England will just want to bank as many points as they can lay their greedy mitts on.
24th over: Ireland 83-7 (Campher 26, McBrine 2) Rashid’s doing good work here, getting some smart turn. And Vince’s near-miss (see 10th over) has got Richard Noble reminiscing. “That’s actually not all that bad,” he avers. “I faced the same rolling ball, kneeling to field it in classic pose at the Toronto Cricket Club while fielding at deep third man in front of the club patio. There I was next to multiple polite folk quaffing champers and masticating gently upon prawn sandwiches. The ball popped up … not at my face … but ‘whither a gentleman wishes a hard ball not’. There was much swearing. There are photos apparently on the web.”
23rd over: Ireland 81-7 (Campher 25, McBrine 1) A single each off Moeen.
22nd over: Ireland 79-7 (Campher 24, McBrine 0) Singh comes in, seems desperate to get off strike as quickly as possible, is beaten by a beauty, hits one straight to Morgan at short cover, and the next time he gets bat on ball he just starts running.
WICKET! Singh run out 0 (Ireland 79-7)
God that’s painful. Singh works the ball to point, calls for a run and sets off; Campher tells him not to be so silly; Banton returns it to Bairstow and Singh is out by miles.
at 10.51am EDT
WICKET! O’Brien c Willey b Rashid 22 (Ireland 79-6)
The partnership is broken! O’Brien tries to lift the ball over deep extra cover and, um, doesn’t.
at 11.07am EDT
20th over: Ireland 76-5 (O’Brien 20, Campher 23) A Rashid maiden; Campher misses a sweep and Bairstow whips off the bails, but the batsman’s back foot is grounded. “It’s nice to see David Willey make a successful return to the one-day side,” writes David Wall. “He must have been pretty devastated to be left out of the World Cup squad after being a regular and important member of the starting XI for much of the previous four years. At least in his public messages he seemed to take it well, just offering his support to those that did get picked, but it must have stung. Hopefully he’ll be part of the next T20 World Cup squad at least. Plus it’s nice to see a (former) Northamptonshire player at international level, they’re a rare bunch in recent years.”
at 10.55am EDT
19th over: Ireland 76-5 (O’Brien 20, Campher 23) Three singles and a wide, courtesy of a bouncer that overbounced.
18th over: Ireland 72-5 (O’Brien 18, Campher 20) It’s now looking like the benign batting track that Balbirnie thought it was when he decided he would like to bat on it as soon as possible. Of course he wouldn’t have thought he’d be batting on it as soon as he was, but that early-innings wicket avalanche is feeling increasingly distant.
17th over: Ireland 70-5 (O’Brien 18, Campher 20) “I was looking at England’s top ODI bowling performances and was astonished by how many of the top ten were made up of medium-paced dibbly-dobbly not-quite all-rounders. I wonder if Willey is going to join that list today,” ponders Tom van der Gucht. “Please don’t tell Willey or Collingwood that I described them in such a way… Or Flintoff…” Here’s a list of England’s ODI five-fers. It’s good to see the Guardian’s very own Vic Marks on there.
16th over: Ireland 69-5 (O’Brien 17, Campher 20) Campher miscues a cut, and cries of “catch it!” die as it lands wide of Moeen and runs away for four.
at 10.21am EDT
15th over: Ireland 60-5 (O’Brien 13, Campher 15) The players have a drink. Finally Ireland have a partnership of sorts, a pair who look minded to stay around and eat up some balls. It still looks likely to be a choice between losing fast and losing slow for Ireland, mind.